I was starting to work on floor plans already and a couple people in the engineering corps spotted them. There was a really pointed conversation about prioritizing us over the emergency bunker they're trying to build, so I can't actually start on the physical part until that's done. Probably about eight weeks? But concept planning is good whenever you feel like it.
Good thing you've got a lot of bunker experience, huh?
I don't really know what I can contribute, I'm more of a "break things" person than a "build things" one, but we can do some brainstorming. We're not hurting for time. How big are you thinking?
That's actually kind of where I wanted your input. Honestly, kitchen and bathroom aren't in my phase 1. I think we're all ready to get some privacy as soon as possible, so living and sleeping spaces are top priority. We can work on the rest after that.
All right, good point. So were you thinking a dorm room kind of situation with a communal living space, or what? I guess we could make a communal sleeping area too
So you want separate rooms in case you snore and it makes me want to tear my ears off? or like I mean we could share a room but we haven't really talked about that and I know you value your space I guess it comes down to whatever is easiest for you to engineer?
I would be lying if I said I didn’t want to sleep with you, because I like having you there. I do think we’d run into some friction in terms of sharing a workspace, though, because I kind of work most effectively in what a well meaning therapist might call “controlled chaos”
Is there a reason you’re not telling me your preference?
Honestly? Because I'm overthinking it and I convinced myself there's a wrong answer.
I like sleeping with you, too.
For the record, no way is any workspace going anywhere near a bedroom. I'll make two in case the buzz saw snoring makes you want to tear your ears off.
That's a priority lower than "have some place to sleep asap" though, so kind of a phase 2 add-on.
[ Nate doesn't have to wonder too hard about "overthinking it," about the "wrong answer," because he's been in that exact position one too many times to really count them all. Afraid of wanting too much or too little, afraid of being presumptuous or being too callous if he didn't feel the same way - or someone didn't feel the same way about him.
For once he feels like he might actually have the emotional bandwidth and capacity to read the situation instead of making guesses in the dark. ]
You're worried about the "move in together" factor, aren't you?
( The tug-o-war going on in his head right now probably exactly matches what Nate is thinking. Is he coming on too strong, does he seem too aloof? Fifty other fucking things all at once. )
There's no wrong answer when it's how you feel about something. If it freaks you out, it freaks you out.
I don't want to sound like I'm giving you unsolicited advice but you don't have to force it to try and get over it if you're not ready, that's always gonna turn out bad
How I react to that is my own thing to deal with, I'm never going to be upset with you for being honest
No no no, I'm not forcing anything, I'm not making myself do it, that's exactly what I was trying to not seem like I was doing while also not pressuring you and making YOU feel forced into doing it because if you didn't want to and you thought I was really gunning for it, it would get awkward
It's neither of those things, which I guess kind of looks like both of those things if you're being weird about it, so I was trying not to be that, too
Ian, I had a mortgage back in New Orleans, so I'm not going to lose my mind over a communal sod house in the far-flung future of an alien planet
If you want to make three separate bedrooms where we sometimes share a bed, that's fine. If you want to make two where we always share a bed, that's fine too. I'm so unbelievably flexible on this that I want to make sure you actually get it.
No overthinking, no twisting yourself into a knot, what makes YOU comfortable?
Well first and foremost what makes me comfortable is you knowing this is gonna be way fucking cooler than a communal sod house and now I'm drawing up plans for a starbucks and a day spa just to prove it
second of all
I want to sleep with you. Like, actual sleep. Not just sleep with you. If you want to.
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nonscriptum) wrote2021-05-14 10:11 am
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You mean to live in? Sort of like the Vardzia dwellings?
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Probably just a touch less impressive, but yeah, essentially.
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I was starting to work on floor plans already and a couple people in the engineering corps spotted them. There was a really pointed conversation about prioritizing us over the emergency bunker they're trying to build, so I can't actually start on the physical part until that's done. Probably about eight weeks? But concept planning is good whenever you feel like it.
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I don't really know what I can contribute, I'm more of a "break things" person than a "build things" one, but we can do some brainstorming. We're not hurting for time. How big are you thinking?
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That's actually kind of where I wanted your input. Honestly, kitchen and bathroom aren't in my phase 1. I think we're all ready to get some privacy as soon as possible, so living and sleeping spaces are top priority. We can work on the rest after that.
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Or a retreat for introverts who need some goddamn solitude to function efficiently.
1/3
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That's only like 50% of my motivation
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So you want separate rooms in case you snore and it makes me want to tear my ears off?
or like
I mean we could share a room
but we haven't really talked about that and I know you value your space
I guess it comes down to whatever is easiest for you to engineer?
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Is there a reason you’re not telling me your preference?
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I like sleeping with you, too.
For the record, no way is any workspace going anywhere near a bedroom. I'll make two in case the buzz saw snoring makes you want to tear your ears off.
That's a priority lower than "have some place to sleep asap" though, so kind of a phase 2 add-on.
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For once he feels like he might actually have the emotional bandwidth and capacity to read the situation instead of making guesses in the dark. ]
You're worried about the "move in together" factor, aren't you?
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is THAT a wrong answer?
( The tug-o-war going on in his head right now probably exactly matches what Nate is thinking. Is he coming on too strong, does he seem too aloof? Fifty other fucking things all at once. )
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I don't want to sound like I'm giving you unsolicited advice but you don't have to force it to try and get over it if you're not ready, that's always gonna turn out bad
How I react to that is my own thing to deal with, I'm never going to be upset with you for being honest
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while
also not pressuring you and making YOU feel forced into doing it because if you didn't want to and you thought I was really gunning for it, it would get
awkward
It's neither of those things, which I guess kind of looks like both of those things if you're being weird about it, so I was trying not to be that, too
nailing it
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If you want to make three separate bedrooms where we sometimes share a bed, that's fine. If you want to make two where we always share a bed, that's fine too. I'm so unbelievably flexible on this that I want to make sure you actually get it.
No overthinking, no twisting yourself into a knot, what makes YOU comfortable?
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second of all
I want to sleep with you. Like, actual sleep. Not just sleep with you. If you want to.
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seriously though
I also want that.
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