do you still go to confessional? I could stand in a closet if you want. Stick up a tension rod with a curtain. Call you "my son". Stop me when it starts getting weird.
A lot of people would walk away from that with a really bitter view on religion. Doesn't seem like that's the case with you. I'm really not into all of it myself, but I think it's kind of nice you didn't. It's easy to let yourself get jaded and cynical.
[ That's...startlingly sincere in a way Nate wasn't exactly anticipating. ]
it wasn't religion's fault i was in an orphanage, and i had plenty of other stuff to get jaded and cynical about.
i don't know, man. faith is just a weird and interesting thing no matter what or who you attach it to. i have a hard time feeling bitter about something that was a part of my life once even if it's not a part of it anymore.
I'm just trying to get your guard down so I can deliver a killing blow later on when you're not expecting it
I don't know, I kinda like the idea of a mid-service snack. Couple of hymns, some weird chanting, somebody says Peace Be With You and then you're like And Also With You, and then you're like boy I could eat
And the little kid in the weird robe comes up and he's like Well good news here's some crackers and some wine, power through it man, it's almost over
See now that I know I'm going back in my mind trying to replay some shit because I'm 99% sure you've made some truly horrific jokes that I didn't get at the time. Jesus Christ, Nathan Francis Drake, that is like THE definition of gallows humor.
i'll be here all week, making death jokes like there's no tomorrow ;)
[ It's a perfectly healthy coping mechanism. ]
transubstantiation is what happens during mass. all those prayers over the wafers and the wine, it's a consecration meant to transmute them into the body and blood of christ. and then you eat them. it's not so much a physical change as it is a mystical one.
so there are a few things I'm taking away from this
1-jesus christ tastes like styrofoam and two buck chuck 2-catholics are fucking cannibals 3-somehow everybody's just fine with like the weirdest shit 4-does the amount of jesus you eat determine what level of heaven you get to? if you eat the full plate of jesus do you go to super heaven?
it's an exclusive club with 0 benefits, i don't know if you qualify.
1. yep 2. that's actually why a lot of romans were pretty intent on persecuting christians, they were convinced they were cannibals 3. 100% 4. no but in the middle ages people could buy indulgences from the church to reduce the punishments they'd suffer for their sins in purgatory and secure them a place in heaven, which was basically a huge scam
I don't know, I feel like I should at least be like an intern or something, considering my planet's gonna be dead within the next couple of years.
2. I never thought I'd say this, but I agree with the romans actually you know what, that's not true, I agree with the romans about a lot of things
4. Wow, I guess some things really don't change. There were an awful lot of poor people in Weaverville, but that megachurch on the highway sure was going strong.
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I could stand in a closet if you want. Stick up a tension rod with a curtain. Call you "my son". Stop me when it starts getting weird.
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2. it was weird at "confessional"
just take pity on me already and give me a few hail marys or something so i can escape the mental image of you pretending to be a priest unscathed
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but please trust me when i say that's for the best
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from what little i remember, it wasn't a big deal in our household either. only became more so being in an institution dedicated to that faith.
[ Nothing quite like wondering whether it was His will that your father dropped you off at the administrative wing of the orphanage and walked away. ]
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it wasn't religion's fault i was in an orphanage, and i had plenty of other stuff to get jaded and cynical about.
i don't know, man. faith is just a weird and interesting thing no matter what or who you attach it to. i have a hard time feeling bitter about something that was a part of my life once even if it's not a part of it anymore.
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I'd love to hear what you DID get jaded and cynical about if it wasn't buff nuns and Christ
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[ He will not. He is incapable of it. ]
and communion wafers. they taste like styrofoam, whose idea WAS that??
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I don't know, I kinda like the idea of a mid-service snack. Couple of hymns, some weird chanting, somebody says Peace Be With You and then you're like And Also With You, and then you're like boy I could eat
And the little kid in the weird robe comes up and he's like
Well good news here's some crackers and some wine, power through it man, it's almost over
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[ He can joke about his mortality, it's fine, wind him up and watch him go. ]
so no one's told you about transubstantiation, huh
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about what
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[ It's a perfectly healthy coping mechanism. ]
transubstantiation is what happens during mass. all those prayers over the wafers and the wine, it's a consecration meant to transmute them into the body and blood of christ. and then you eat them. it's not so much a physical change as it is a mystical one.
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starting to wish I could join you
[ Kill him, these jokes are terrible. ]
so
there are a few things I'm taking away from this
1-jesus christ tastes like styrofoam and two buck chuck
2-catholics are fucking cannibals
3-somehow everybody's just fine with like the weirdest shit
4-does the amount of jesus you eat determine what level of heaven you get to? if you eat the full plate of jesus do you go to super heaven?
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1. yep
2. that's actually why a lot of romans were pretty intent on persecuting christians, they were convinced they were cannibals
3. 100%
4. no but in the middle ages people could buy indulgences from the church to reduce the punishments they'd suffer for their sins in purgatory and secure them a place in heaven, which was basically a huge scam
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2. I never thought I'd say this, but I agree with the romans
actually you know what, that's not true, I agree with the romans about a lot of things
4. Wow, I guess some things really don't change. There were an awful lot of poor people in Weaverville, but that megachurch on the highway sure was going strong.
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2. aqueducts were cool. special jars intended to fatten dormice for consumption were kind of gross though
4. same strategy, different packaging.
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[ Can Nate read that in the level of deadpan Ian intends it to be? ]
2. I did not know about the jars
I was happier not knowing about the jars
Why are you trying to turn me against the romans
what's your agenda here
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