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[nonscriptum]

@nathan.drake| ■ ▲ ◌ ▼

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YOU LITERALLY JUST DID

[wittingly]

Sorry man, that wasn't me, that's actually a system that's been in place since shortly after the fall of Constantinople.

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sure, blame it on the ottoman empire, they're an easy target.

i think it goes without saying this applies to you too, though. i don't want to hear that you got caught trying to burgle a place when you could've just run it by me first.

[wittingly]

that's nobody's business but the turks.

I solemnly swear not to burgle anyone without consulting my expert burgling advisor

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good. starting to think i need to make business cards for this shit.

[wittingly]

nothing says 'trust me, I'm a professional thief' like a dozen wallet-sized admissions of guilt

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admitting to being a thief isn't the same as admitting to specific thefts, your honor, and you'd know that if you'd ever been arrested or spent any amount of time in prison.

i just mean that if people are going to try to do sketchy stuff, and they're going to do it either way, they should at least do it right. they should have help.

[ After reflection he has to assume that's what Sam was trying to do, to some extent. It doesn't make Nate any less worried because he didn't know. ]

[wittingly]

I know what you meant. I've met you.

The problem is nobody really seems to be willing to trust the judgement of others that may be more skilled in a particular field than they are.

There's an abundance of pride and hubris, and it really makes me wonder if this place isn't populated by action movie heros used to protagonistic invulnerability. Too many of you guys are great at triumphantly overcoming all odds for your own good. Not enough come from doomed planets with no hope, or ones where you're walking down a hallway and someone else is coming from the other direction and you spend too long doing the awkward hallway dance to remind you how insignificant you are in the universe.

[nonscriptum]

[ It's a good argument, and Nate isn't so myopic as to think that everyone is capable of surviving the same crap that he does - he's learned that the hard way, and even Nathan Drake couldn't escape consequences when they nudged him over a cliff.

He could say as much - suddenly wants to, for reasons that he can't define - but it would distract from the point Ian is trying to make. There's no place to make this about him when it's not. ]

you're right.

there's a pretty pervasive attitude that some people know better than others regardless of whether they actually do, and i'm just as guilty of that. getting people to listen is hard. getting people to listen when they're convinced their way is the right way is harder.

there's a lot of cheap talk about collaboration and doing things for the good of everybody without actually involving everybody in the conversation. i don't know how to fix that. i don't even know where to start.

[wittingly]

Not to be pessimistic, but maybe thinking that's something we can fix is just a different shade of that same hubris. Changing a single person's mind can be a daunting task, let alone half a dozen of them that reaffirm each other's behavior and decisions consistently.

I can't even get Kyna to see my perspective about a comparatively small side quest. Reforming the displaced into a democracy...

I'm not holding my breath. Democracy didn't hold up where I'm from either.

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fair enough. i don't want to change minds, though. i don't want to lead anything, or make any big, sweeping decisions on behalf of everybody else, i just want there to be some accountability on the part of the people who DO, and i don't want people's concerns to keep getting swatted down with "we don't have time for that."

we do have time. everybody should have a say in the decision-making process and people should be able to bring their expertise to the table, and i know that sounds idealistic as hell but i'm living in this world now and it's all i've got left.

[wittingly]

[ Skrrt, about derailing the conversation - Nate has better self restraint than Ian, because he veers as soon as he reads that last bit. ]

You don't plan on trying to go home?

1/2

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[ Fuck. ]

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i can't.

[wittingly]

this is the part where I prompt you to elaborate

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this is the part where i really don't want to say this over text.

[wittingly]

you wanna come over?

[ He'd offer to make the trip, except he's pretty sure talking about it in front of the whole family isn't ideal either. ]

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[ What he wants is to go back to what they were talking about before this, because it's still important and there has to be some solution to bridge the divides of miscommunication, to ensure everyone is working together, not working at cross-purposes. Not being at odds. Nate counts himself as having room for improvement, as well.

But Ian latches onto minutiae with the pinpoint precision of a fucking engineer, so here they are. ]

yeah, ok.
give me 15 minutes.

[wittingly]

[ Sure, they can swing back to that topic. After the one he finds more important, personally.

Sorry, man. There's still time to dip out of this one, run while you've got the chance. Speaking of which: ]

remind me to code your implant to the lock when you get here so I can stop standing up when you come over.

[ He suffereth. ]

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[ Nate considers not showing up.

He waffles about it the entire way over, and avenues for departing from the subject are in every direction: alleys, streets, bridges that stretch around and divert him from the apartment his feet keep walking him toward like they know he's supposed to be getting better at this stuff instead of violently shoving it into a box, only to have a minor meltdown once a month. It's fine. He's fine.

He knocks thrice the way he always does and leans against the jamb, feeling his stomach lurch the same way it did when he last told someone else, the same way it did when he fell. ]

[wittingly]

[ Nate not showing up would have made for a very interesting turn of events. It's really better for the both of them that he does.

When the door opens and Ian catches a quick glimpse at his body language, the concern starts filtering in properly. ]

Oh shit, we're about to have a bonding moment.

[ Pleasantly yet grimly observed; he gestures Nate in. ]

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[ The smile Nate flashes is a quick, shuttered thing when he walks through the door, not especially fond of the reductive descriptor of what is otherwise a very difficult subject to express to people, but that's not Ian's fault. He doesn't know. ]

Don't forget to code my implant.

[ He says on the way to the sofa, shrugging his jacket off and draping it over the back of the couch. ]

[wittingly]

Right, thanks.

[ Levelly, and extremely aware of the general feel of the room -- but no idea what the cause is, or that he's inadvertently stepping on it. As such, he carries on with some gentle levity while he preemptively goes to grab Nate a drink. ]

You just have to say the password. It's Matisyahu.

[ There's no password, he already did it, it's an automated thing. ]

[nonscriptum]

Thanks.

[ Nate watches Ian move into his kitchen, retrieving something, stuck staring at the line of his shoulders like they're somehow going to give him the words he has to say.

He can't be this reluctant, he can't act like this is the verbal equivalent to pulling teeth even if it feels that way, but more than anything Nate knows that saying it makes it that much more real. Makes it concrete. Makes it so the other things attached to it are foregone conclusions and they'll never see a resolution. ]

You asked why I'm not trying to go home.

[wittingly]

[ When he returns it's with a beer in hand for Nate, because it's hard to turn off default consolation offerings. He settles down sideways on the couch not terribly unlike the last time Nate was here, but with a far more serious countenance. ]

I did.

[ Returned dutifully, patient but probing. Take your time, man, he's not gonna try and drag it out of you. Accidental misstep aside, he otherwise has a decent amount of tact. ]