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[nonscriptum]

@indy
This is Nate. Leave a message.

Comments

[wittingly]

that's doing a huge disservice to your chest

[nonscriptum]

Can you break it down into percentages for me? I need to know how all the parts shake out

[wittingly]

you really wanna open this can of worms
because I can break down the numbers
I don't know if you're ready for that

[nonscriptum]

The anticipation is killing me, now I HAVE to know

hit me with it, Mr. Engineer

1/2

[wittingly]

2/2

[wittingly]

just kidding

5% hands
5% you're fucking crazy
5% chest
10% shoulders + shoulder holster, I cannot stress this enough
15% face
20% heart
40% brain

1/2

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[nonscriptum]

I don’t know how you made math sound so sincere but

you did it

what happens if I don’t have the shoulder holster on

[wittingly]

Math can be very romantic when you're dating an engineer, Winnesota



& nothing, I just really, really like that shoulder holster

[nonscriptum]

I go by Misconsin now, actually.

Gonna go out on a limb and say you had a crush on Indiana Jones as a teenager, didn’t you?

[wittingly]

I don't see what that has to do with me looking really cool right now and how dare you typecast me

[nonscriptum]

It's okay, you can be honest with me, this is a safe space

[wittingly]

If I say yes, are you gonna get a hat and a whip

[nonscriptum]

if I find any
maybe

[wittingly]

if only we knew somebody that could make something like that
so many tragic lost opportunities

[nonscriptum]

I don't know why you keep setting up these scenarios when you know exactly what you can do

Is it just because you want me to compliment you?

[wittingly]

Wow
How could you imply
The sheer vanity
Yes obviously

[nonscriptum]

I'd rather do it in person so I can watch you fluster

[wittingly]

Pfff
You can't fluster me
I'm unflusterable
If anybody is the flusterer here it's me

[nonscriptum]

You sure are protesting a lot

[wittingly]

This is a normal amount of protesting

[nonscriptum]

okay, okay, you're right
I have no influence on you whatsoever
you are a rock. an island.

[wittingly]

Exactly
Like the Maldives
Or Alcatraz

Somewhere in the middle of those

[nonscriptum]

I basically have so little effect I don't even know why we're seeing each other

wait, no, I know why
it's the shoulder holster

[wittingly]

Well, let's not get carried away
It's also the face and the brain and the other stuff I said