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well, fair enough. still might be enlightening. you want to meet somewhere?
I know, it's not... It's not really that I think you're going to have a problem with it, but you still have a lot to deal with already.
[So as much as he knows Nate doesn't mind, Lance still feels guilty about adding to it. But he's trying to take what Ian and many others have said to him, about how listening to and helping with problems is what friends do, and it's not something he should be so hesitant to be on the receiving side of.
But that's all easier said--or in this case thought--than done; he shifts on his feet and glances around them again, trying to figure out what he actually wants to say and what words he wants to use, struggling to resist the natural urge to stall further by asking Nate how he's doing with things, and if there's anything he can do to help. He knows the latter would be rightly called out immediately.
It isn't helpful that Lance is self-aware enough to know that he needs to talk to someone, but also so far past that point that he feel completely disconnected from it. It's almost like it's trying to talk for someone else, but even then his empathy usually kicks in and makes it simple enough to feel something for them. Right now everything is just so muted that it's difficult to find the incentive to describe it, but after another several seconds of trying to remind himself that this is important he finally manages to start.]
I'm kind of... I'm having a hard time dealing with everything, but it's not about the Aerie, exactly.
[Which just kind of adds to the uncertainty he feels about bringing any of this up; almost everyone is dealing with what they've all just gone through, but most of that's hardly even registering for him. Maybe it will later, especially some specific events, but it's certainly not his main cause of stress at the moment.]
[So as much as he knows Nate doesn't mind, Lance still feels guilty about adding to it. But he's trying to take what Ian and many others have said to him, about how listening to and helping with problems is what friends do, and it's not something he should be so hesitant to be on the receiving side of.
But that's all easier said--or in this case thought--than done; he shifts on his feet and glances around them again, trying to figure out what he actually wants to say and what words he wants to use, struggling to resist the natural urge to stall further by asking Nate how he's doing with things, and if there's anything he can do to help. He knows the latter would be rightly called out immediately.
It isn't helpful that Lance is self-aware enough to know that he needs to talk to someone, but also so far past that point that he feel completely disconnected from it. It's almost like it's trying to talk for someone else, but even then his empathy usually kicks in and makes it simple enough to feel something for them. Right now everything is just so muted that it's difficult to find the incentive to describe it, but after another several seconds of trying to remind himself that this is important he finally manages to start.]
I'm kind of... I'm having a hard time dealing with everything, but it's not about the Aerie, exactly.
[Which just kind of adds to the uncertainty he feels about bringing any of this up; almost everyone is dealing with what they've all just gone through, but most of that's hardly even registering for him. Maybe it will later, especially some specific events, but it's certainly not his main cause of stress at the moment.]
honestly?
[ Honestly, he's shared a lot already, which isn't something he's comfortable with, particularly when it's not just an accurate description of Sam's life. It's Nate's life, too. ]
that's not for me to speculate. he'll work through his crap in his own time, however long that takes.
[ Honestly, he's shared a lot already, which isn't something he's comfortable with, particularly when it's not just an accurate description of Sam's life. It's Nate's life, too. ]
that's not for me to speculate. he'll work through his crap in his own time, however long that takes.
i know that
it's just not my place to guess what's going on with him beyond what i actually know
it's just not my place to guess what's going on with him beyond what i actually know
Let me make one thing clear.
Any attempts to use my partner, Ren Amamiya, to make yourself look like the martyr because he raised a casual concern won't end well for you in the future. Unlike that circumstances, I will always be here, and my bite is much worse than my bark.
Don't do it again.
And yes, before you deliver some pithy remark in return, this is a threat.
Any attempts to use my partner, Ren Amamiya, to make yourself look like the martyr because he raised a casual concern won't end well for you in the future. Unlike that circumstances, I will always be here, and my bite is much worse than my bark.
Don't do it again.
And yes, before you deliver some pithy remark in return, this is a threat.
prior to having my face projected into everybody's skulls in another world rendering my anonymity here moot, i definitely had a lot more hobbies
i was a thief, technically, but more of a treasure hunter? travel, see a lot of exotic places, climb a lot of crumbling ruins in lost cities, get into gunfights with mercenaries, find artifacts.
not a lot of call for that here, so i use the gates fairly often when i'm not working.
i was a thief, technically, but more of a treasure hunter? travel, see a lot of exotic places, climb a lot of crumbling ruins in lost cities, get into gunfights with mercenaries, find artifacts.
not a lot of call for that here, so i use the gates fairly often when i'm not working.
celebrity
i was blackmailed into being a public figure, except the brand and movie deals got spiced up with the occasional mass melee in an arena designed to kill us
forced to participate in the televised gladiator games for 20 goddamn years of my life, which is literally more than half my life
i was blackmailed into being a public figure, except the brand and movie deals got spiced up with the occasional mass melee in an arena designed to kill us
forced to participate in the televised gladiator games for 20 goddamn years of my life, which is literally more than half my life
it was. and thanks, it's
i feel worse for other people who aren't used to that kind of crap, though, you know?
i was almost always running into somebody who wanted to kill me back home
i feel worse for other people who aren't used to that kind of crap, though, you know?
i was almost always running into somebody who wanted to kill me back home
no, i get it.
i had a lot of the same shit back home
the natives to this place aren't used to any of this bullcrap
and a lot of our own aren't either
so all of this bullcrap is going to hit them significantly harder than those of us who aren't as new to death matches and being murdered
i had a lot of the same shit back home
the natives to this place aren't used to any of this bullcrap
and a lot of our own aren't either
so all of this bullcrap is going to hit them significantly harder than those of us who aren't as new to death matches and being murdered
[ They all have a lot to deal with, but it doesn't mean he can't carry a little bit of Lance's not-insubstantial weight. They've always been a little too similar in that regard, bouncing around subjects with ease, ignoring the ones that feel difficult in favor of concentrating on somebody else's problems. There's a satisfaction in helping another person, even when you can't help yourself.
Nate has his suspicions. They've known each other for over two years, he's extremely aware of the way Lance makes diversions look effortless, and he sure as Hell isn't alone in the bone-deep exhaustion that can't entirely be attributed to that other world.
I'm king of having a hard time dealing with everything, but it's not about the Aerie.
The confirmation is nice, even if the implications aren't. Nate looks at him for a long moment, trying to parse out an emotion that he's reading as doubt even if he isn't sure that's accurate.
Swing and a- ]
It's all the network shit, right? The...repeated attempts at doing something only to get slapped in the face? Or told you're wrong? Or told you should do something differently? That you're overreacting?
Nate has his suspicions. They've known each other for over two years, he's extremely aware of the way Lance makes diversions look effortless, and he sure as Hell isn't alone in the bone-deep exhaustion that can't entirely be attributed to that other world.
I'm king of having a hard time dealing with everything, but it's not about the Aerie.
The confirmation is nice, even if the implications aren't. Nate looks at him for a long moment, trying to parse out an emotion that he's reading as doubt even if he isn't sure that's accurate.
Swing and a- ]
It's all the network shit, right? The...repeated attempts at doing something only to get slapped in the face? Or told you're wrong? Or told you should do something differently? That you're overreacting?
[ Far be it from Nate to ever criticize somebody for smuggling goods given his own history, but the rest of it hits like a relentless punch in the gut. There are things you look past when someone is the only person you have. Flaws you justify, or ignore, because the circumstances are dire and maybe a decision was stupid or selfish and the worst part is not knowing how to feel angry. When someone is your provider, your protector, it's easy to bury the bad.
All you see is the good.
Nate is no stranger to making enemies and knows the dangers - Hell, Rafe got what he wanted in the end, didn't he? - so it is with growing horror that he sees exactly which direction this story is taking before Ellie even mentions that Joel went missing.
He watches her intently, impassive, the way her hands clench and the implication that she saw the drawn-out consequences firsthand. It's a miracle they didn't kill her, too.
But it's the tension in the thin string of her voice that says she either acted, or intended to do so. ]
...what did you do, Ellie?
All you see is the good.
Nate is no stranger to making enemies and knows the dangers - Hell, Rafe got what he wanted in the end, didn't he? - so it is with growing horror that he sees exactly which direction this story is taking before Ellie even mentions that Joel went missing.
He watches her intently, impassive, the way her hands clench and the implication that she saw the drawn-out consequences firsthand. It's a miracle they didn't kill her, too.
But it's the tension in the thin string of her voice that says she either acted, or intended to do so. ]
...what did you do, Ellie?
Great. I keep getting recognized in the street as "celebrity murderer Nathan Drake."
[ It's brief, that contact, but Nate and Sam so rarely touch each other with anything more than a clap on the shoulders that it feels like someone just prodded him in the solar plexus. For his own part Nate offers an involuntary flash of weariness, of guilt and longing.
Not that dissimilar, actually.
The boyish smile he usually wears is superseded by stony impassivity, no humor in his voice when he adds: ]
Loving that.
[ It's brief, that contact, but Nate and Sam so rarely touch each other with anything more than a clap on the shoulders that it feels like someone just prodded him in the solar plexus. For his own part Nate offers an involuntary flash of weariness, of guilt and longing.
Not that dissimilar, actually.
The boyish smile he usually wears is superseded by stony impassivity, no humor in his voice when he adds: ]
Loving that.
[ Back in Hadriel, Staci Pratt had once asked Nate how he handled killing. If it ever got any easier, if he ever thought about it beyond its necessity to his own survival. Hard fucking questions from someone so shook up with PTSD and cult indoctrination that he was having trouble parsing himself from the person he wanted to be.
Nate didn't have a good answer for him.
You never get used to it. You just stop looking. ]
i don't know how to help natives except hope this world has robust mental healthcare
as for our own people
it's hard for a lot of them to stomach
it's not that i think they have to, but in the coming weeks i get the feeling we're going to be seeing a lot of volatility out of self-defense and self-protection
Nate didn't have a good answer for him.
You never get used to it. You just stop looking. ]
i don't know how to help natives except hope this world has robust mental healthcare
as for our own people
it's hard for a lot of them to stomach
it's not that i think they have to, but in the coming weeks i get the feeling we're going to be seeing a lot of volatility out of self-defense and self-protection
Yeah, you and me both.
[ He's got the feeling he hasn't had it nearly as bad as Nathan, but between people squinting at him and finding brotherly resemblance and old-timers guessing he was the asshole who won two Quarries and then pushed his baby brother into winning plenty more? It's been a hell of a return to "normal."
Just more reasons not to baby a city's worth of people who lived and died and profited in that world, same as them.
More important is what he catches from Nathan's fingertips, that sense of exhaustion at the whole world. He's taking it hard. Of course he's taking it hard. ]
They're gonna get over it. Might take some time, but-- [ We bring back a treasure like that, anyone would. If he notices the parallel, the awareness doesn't make it to his face. ] They were there, too. We all did what we had to.
[ He's got the feeling he hasn't had it nearly as bad as Nathan, but between people squinting at him and finding brotherly resemblance and old-timers guessing he was the asshole who won two Quarries and then pushed his baby brother into winning plenty more? It's been a hell of a return to "normal."
Just more reasons not to baby a city's worth of people who lived and died and profited in that world, same as them.
More important is what he catches from Nathan's fingertips, that sense of exhaustion at the whole world. He's taking it hard. Of course he's taking it hard. ]
They're gonna get over it. Might take some time, but-- [ We bring back a treasure like that, anyone would. If he notices the parallel, the awareness doesn't make it to his face. ] They were there, too. We all did what we had to.
that's
[ Not the right colloquialism, he doesn't think, but it's honestly hysterical enough that he'd prefer to keep it that way. ]
definitely a good way of putting it
there's a few private rooftop gardens in our general area, i'll send you a ping to one.
[ Not the right colloquialism, he doesn't think, but it's honestly hysterical enough that he'd prefer to keep it that way. ]
definitely a good way of putting it
there's a few private rooftop gardens in our general area, i'll send you a ping to one.
promises, promises
taco place across from the gym?
taco place across from the gym?
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