![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
[ It's been around five days since he saw the sun for the first time in at least seven short lives. Stephen's signed off with Clarke, made arrangements for the bar. He's moved Tony out of the safehouse and into his lounge. He's gone on walks through parks and botanical gardens, through day and through night, among people and in solitude.
None of it's really doing what he needs it to.
He hasn't been keeping company much, not reaching out. There's been thinking to do. Sense to make of things that ache to dwell on. But there comes a point when it's clear he's out of juice.
He knows what he needs thanks in large part to a memory of a conversation. Armed with it, Stephen pushes past hesitation and reaches out to someone he can only assume is wading through a similar sludge of his own. ]
About that mini-break.
[ He can't be the only one who needs a vacation. ]
None of it's really doing what he needs it to.
He hasn't been keeping company much, not reaching out. There's been thinking to do. Sense to make of things that ache to dwell on. But there comes a point when it's clear he's out of juice.
He knows what he needs thanks in large part to a memory of a conversation. Armed with it, Stephen pushes past hesitation and reaches out to someone he can only assume is wading through a similar sludge of his own. ]
About that mini-break.
[ He can't be the only one who needs a vacation. ]
Edited 2020-06-18 00:06 (UTC)
[ They haven't talked since the simulation, and who would want to? Shared trauma is still trauma, and people need to process shit in their own time and their own ways. He might have expected Stephen to go on a bender if the guy wasn't so unfailingly ascetic in everything he does outside of the occasional drink, mid-work. Nate's favored tactic is isolation.
He finds a high, lonely place, a vantage of the world around him, a simulacrum of control so he doesn't drift in the lack thereof. Stability comes on good days and on bad ones, he takes out pent-up frustrations with his fists, the knuckles raw and bloody when he makes his way back to the little apartment he shares with a friend he tries not to drag into his moods.
He thinks of extending a hand, and doesn't. Until his phone pings. ]
i hear belize is nice this time of year.
He finds a high, lonely place, a vantage of the world around him, a simulacrum of control so he doesn't drift in the lack thereof. Stability comes on good days and on bad ones, he takes out pent-up frustrations with his fists, the knuckles raw and bloody when he makes his way back to the little apartment he shares with a friend he tries not to drag into his moods.
He thinks of extending a hand, and doesn't. Until his phone pings. ]
i hear belize is nice this time of year.
so now that this pos network is working again
u there?
cuz i havent heard anything from u since this whole bullshit started and im getting kinda paranoid that ur avoiding me :p
u there?
cuz i havent heard anything from u since this whole bullshit started and im getting kinda paranoid that ur avoiding me :p
That's New Belize to you.
[ No, that's for cities not countries. But this is a pattern they've fallen into, conversations like a sight-seeing tour: eyes on passing scenery and sitting back to back, each comment on the view a felt reminder of company. ]
I've not been.
[ Somewhere new sounds good. ]
[ No, that's for cities not countries. But this is a pattern they've fallen into, conversations like a sight-seeing tour: eyes on passing scenery and sitting back to back, each comment on the view a felt reminder of company. ]
I've not been.
[ Somewhere new sounds good. ]
hey
i'm sorry, i'm not trying to avoid you
[ He means that much, at least, but Nate is aware he hasn't spent a great deal of time in their shared apartment since the simulation ended. Way to stab him with the guilt dagger though, Wade. ]
haven't been feeling that sociable since we got out.
i'm sorry, i'm not trying to avoid you
[ He means that much, at least, but Nate is aware he hasn't spent a great deal of time in their shared apartment since the simulation ended. Way to stab him with the guilt dagger though, Wade. ]
haven't been feeling that sociable since we got out.
[ That's cities, not countries, is what he wants to say, but he's conscious that Stephen is smart enough to know as much and it's a bit like going on a long drive and pointing out all the cows you see along the way. ]
we got a belize virgin over here, folks
you ever been scuba diving?
we got a belize virgin over here, folks
you ever been scuba diving?
[Well that wasn't the response he was hoping for. Apparently his well-meaning lighthearted comment isn't appropriate right now, and the strange, intense feeling of relief Wade feels at hearing from Nate is completely overshadowed by his own stab of guilt.]
Sorry. Meant for that to be a joke. I'm awesome at this lol.
You okay? Need me to pilfer some booze from the storage? I'm sure the boss-man won't mind.
[A few seconds go by, and then...]
That was another joke, btw.
Sorry. Meant for that to be a joke. I'm awesome at this lol.
You okay? Need me to pilfer some booze from the storage? I'm sure the boss-man won't mind.
[A few seconds go by, and then...]
That was another joke, btw.
Edited 2020-06-20 16:21 (UTC)
yeah, pretty frequently.
[ Came with the territory of pilfering underwater graves and subsequently doing legitimate salvage work. He doesn't know how much they've change the tech in 500 years, though. For all he knows they could have re-breathers that last entire days. ]
if it freaks you out you can always snorkel.
[ Came with the territory of pilfering underwater graves and subsequently doing legitimate salvage work. He doesn't know how much they've change the tech in 500 years, though. For all he knows they could have re-breathers that last entire days. ]
if it freaks you out you can always snorkel.
you don't have to apologize.
i figured that was the case, just didn't want you to think i was leaving you hanging. you're ok though, right? since you got out?
i figured that was the case, just didn't want you to think i was leaving you hanging. you're ok though, right? since you got out?
eh could be better, could be worse
at least i can get some decent food again
how u holding up
[Don't think he didn't notice that you avoided answering the first time, duderino.]
at least i can get some decent food again
how u holding up
[Don't think he didn't notice that you avoided answering the first time, duderino.]
[ STOP NOTICING HIS SWERVING, PAL ]
kind of shitty, but no shock there. mostly just tired?
kind of shitty, but no shock there. mostly just tired?
yeah me too
i was wondering if it was just me enjoying having an actual bed again but i guess its probably more than that huh
lemme guess-- nightmares, trouble sleeping and all that good shit?
[He doesn't mention the scars.]
i was wondering if it was just me enjoying having an actual bed again but i guess its probably more than that huh
lemme guess-- nightmares, trouble sleeping and all that good shit?
[He doesn't mention the scars.]
on a good day. sometimes i just don't sleep at all.
[ What he doesn't say is that that was pretty much his usual evening before he picked up a roommate and forced himself to have some semblance of normalcy. ]
i've been kidnapped, drugged, blown up, knifed, had the shit kicked out of me, but nobody was ever like "time to take this guy's organs out and play with them for a bit"
[ What he doesn't say is that that was pretty much his usual evening before he picked up a roommate and forced himself to have some semblance of normalcy. ]
i've been kidnapped, drugged, blown up, knifed, had the shit kicked out of me, but nobody was ever like "time to take this guy's organs out and play with them for a bit"
Edited 2020-06-22 03:22 (UTC)
I know, right? Who does that?
[The blase comment was more out of a need to say something than any sort of lack of sentiment. Wade suddenly feels something hot and dangerous rising inside him, something ugly and dark, and for a second he can't really understand what it is.
It's not fair. Torment like that should be reserved for the people who deserve it. Not Nate. Not the guy who offered him a job and a place to stay his first day there.]
Hey listen, I know doctors say that you shouldn't self-medicate, but I never trusted doctors soooo...
Wanna maybe talk it out over drinks?
[The blase comment was more out of a need to say something than any sort of lack of sentiment. Wade suddenly feels something hot and dangerous rising inside him, something ugly and dark, and for a second he can't really understand what it is.
It's not fair. Torment like that should be reserved for the people who deserve it. Not Nate. Not the guy who offered him a job and a place to stay his first day there.]
Hey listen, I know doctors say that you shouldn't self-medicate, but I never trusted doctors soooo...
Wanna maybe talk it out over drinks?
[ Nate can't reassure someone for the umpteenth time that he's largely all right outside of the recent memories he's trying to smother, and he knows with certainty that he can't reassure Wade. The guy's got a caring streak a mile wide based on what Nate knows of him, or else he wouldn't have reached out in the first place.
Not everyone does. ]
sure, i could go for a drink. [ He doesn't commit to talking about it. ] usual spot?
Not everyone does. ]
sure, i could go for a drink. [ He doesn't commit to talking about it. ] usual spot?
Sounds good.
Meet you there in about 10 minutes?
[Wade figures that'll be enough time for Nate to decide whether he's gonna come clean or try to keep up the bullshit. He's on to you, dude.]
Meet you there in about 10 minutes?
[Wade figures that'll be enough time for Nate to decide whether he's gonna come clean or try to keep up the bullshit. He's on to you, dude.]
see you soon.
[ The thing is, he doesn't want to talk about it. Nate has never been especially adept at emotional vulnerability even with people he trusts with his damn life, and despite their friendship and general dynamic he isn't keen on sharing with Wade. Not because he thinks Wade will turn around and volunteer what Nate divulges to somebody else, but because he just doesn't like to share.
It's nothing personal. It's just Nate.
Their usual spot is one of Nate's many haunts: the rooftop over Red Wings, once a desolate concrete pad and parapet, now crawling with vines. He's early because he was at work and managed to slide out early with promises to pick up several shifts later, a bottle of something in hand. He didn't care to read the label when he grabbed it from the stock room. ]
[ The thing is, he doesn't want to talk about it. Nate has never been especially adept at emotional vulnerability even with people he trusts with his damn life, and despite their friendship and general dynamic he isn't keen on sharing with Wade. Not because he thinks Wade will turn around and volunteer what Nate divulges to somebody else, but because he just doesn't like to share.
It's nothing personal. It's just Nate.
Their usual spot is one of Nate's many haunts: the rooftop over Red Wings, once a desolate concrete pad and parapet, now crawling with vines. He's early because he was at work and managed to slide out early with promises to pick up several shifts later, a bottle of something in hand. He didn't care to read the label when he grabbed it from the stock room. ]
[It's about five minutes later that Wade opens the door to the rooftop, his posture relaxing as he sees Nate sitting in their usual spot as if the past month or so hasn't happened. Even though it's been a few days since their initial return to the city, it's still good to see his roommate again.
Wade sinks down to sit beside Nate, setting down the six pack he'd picked up along the way.]
Wasn't sure if you liked Bohemian but that's what I was feelin' like.
Wade sinks down to sit beside Nate, setting down the six pack he'd picked up along the way.]
Wasn't sure if you liked Bohemian but that's what I was feelin' like.
[ The metal door creaks open and footsteps follow. The only person Nate knows comes up here besides the occasional janitor for a smoke is Wade, and the telltale padding of his boots as he approaches and settles at Nate's side, case in hand. He turns to look at him, the close-cropped hair and the occasional facial scars, the obvious tension they're all trying to release one way or another. ]
You won't see me complaining.
[ He admits, turning and setting the bottle he brought near the beer before focusing on Wade. Nate tries a small smile on for size, shoulders sagging. ]
Hey.
You won't see me complaining.
[ He admits, turning and setting the bottle he brought near the beer before focusing on Wade. Nate tries a small smile on for size, shoulders sagging. ]
Hey.
Hey yourself.
[Nate's trying his damndest to put on a happy face right now, but Wade can spot a bullshitter a mile away. Not that it'd be hard to spot in this instance-- whatever talents Nate might have hidden behind that pleasant demeanor and easygoing attitude, a good poker face is definitely not one of them.
Wade merely focuses on digging out a cold one from the six pack, unscrewing the cap with a hiss and taking a swig.]
Almost started to forget what this place looked like at night. You want one of these?
[Nate's trying his damndest to put on a happy face right now, but Wade can spot a bullshitter a mile away. Not that it'd be hard to spot in this instance-- whatever talents Nate might have hidden behind that pleasant demeanor and easygoing attitude, a good poker face is definitely not one of them.
Wade merely focuses on digging out a cold one from the six pack, unscrewing the cap with a hiss and taking a swig.]
Almost started to forget what this place looked like at night. You want one of these?
The plants are an improvement.
[ He observes wryly, nodding in acquiescence and looking down at the bottles between them, selecting one by its neck. It's still weird to him, seeing most things wrapped in aluminum. Nate never thought he'd miss glass beer bottles.
He twists the top off and pauses before taking a sip. ]
You were in the sim, right?
[ He observes wryly, nodding in acquiescence and looking down at the bottles between them, selecting one by its neck. It's still weird to him, seeing most things wrapped in aluminum. Nate never thought he'd miss glass beer bottles.
He twists the top off and pauses before taking a sip. ]
You were in the sim, right?
[That earns Nate a cynical laugh.]
Sure was. Probably gonna be passing those gross cubes through my colon for months. Any more of that crap and I'd probably be able to poop out those big cardboard sheets you get at Staples.
[Great mental image there, Wade. He turns to look at Nate out of the corner of his eye.]
How 'bout you? You're lookin' pretty healthy for a guy who apparently starred in a live-action version of Operation.
[The comment is blase enough, but the concern in Wade's eyes is palpable.]
Sure was. Probably gonna be passing those gross cubes through my colon for months. Any more of that crap and I'd probably be able to poop out those big cardboard sheets you get at Staples.
[Great mental image there, Wade. He turns to look at Nate out of the corner of his eye.]
How 'bout you? You're lookin' pretty healthy for a guy who apparently starred in a live-action version of Operation.
[The comment is blase enough, but the concern in Wade's eyes is palpable.]
Edited 2020-06-30 20:36 (UTC)
[ The face Nate makes is something he doesn't even bother to hide. He remembers the cubes, sure, but thinking about his simulated intestines is just as gross as if it really applied to the real world. Nate is suddenly grateful he spent most of his time conveniently dying to find out more about their captors. ]
...eh.
[ He gestures loosely toward his own abdomen, free hand falling into his lap. ]
It's... [ Not fine. He can't say that. ] I don't like doctors, but these guys would put Hippocrates to shame. They were more like butchers.
...eh.
[ He gestures loosely toward his own abdomen, free hand falling into his lap. ]
It's... [ Not fine. He can't say that. ] I don't like doctors, but these guys would put Hippocrates to shame. They were more like butchers.
Page 6 of 49